Imagine this conversation, between me and a client who’s looking to bring in more business.

Me: What about giving your potential client a quick call?
Client: That’s not really in my lane.
Me: How about grabbing lunch with a colleague you haven’t seen in a while?
Client: They already know me. Not sure what difference that would make.

Me: Could you reach out to some current clients and deepen those relationships?
Client: They hear from me monthly already via my newsletter.
Me: That’s the generic newsletter your assistant sends out, right?
Client: …Yes.
Me: What if something came from you directly — something more personal? That might encourage them to stick around a bit longer.
Client: Maybe. I’m not sure…..

And on it went. No matter what suggestion came up, the answer was hesitation, if not a flat-out no.

Fear is what drives these kinds of conversations. This client had come to me feeling pressure: a few of her clients were about to wrap up, and she wanted to bring new ones in before the gap hit. But everything we brainstormed? Shot down. She’d already tried it, wasn’t good at it, or it was technically someone else’s responsibility. I could feel her wanting to take action, and the simultaneous frustration of not knowing what to do, or how to get started.

And she’s not the only one who feels this way — maybe it sounds familiar to you, too?

To run your business, marketing and selling are a must. So what stops you? Your old friends: fear and resistance.

Fear + resistance often show up in sneaky ways — as internal noise, overthinking, procrastination, or the classic “I’ll do it tomorrow.” That inner whining? It’s just fear in disguise.

Tell me if any of these sound familiar:

• I hate marketing.
• This is way too hard.
• What I love to do doesn’t bring in clients.
• Everyone else is better at this than I am.
• Selling feels gross.
• I don’t want to bug people./li>
• People are too busy.
• I need clients but can’t market because [insert creative excuse here].

All smoke screens, every single one.

Very few people are born knowing how to market or sell in a way that feels natural. The good news? You just need to find one or two ways that feel do-able that will attract your ideal clients, and do them over and over.

Here are some user-friendly ways to do that:

• DM or voice message someone you’d like to partner with on a project.
• Post a meaningful short story or insight on LinkedIn, Instagram, or your favorite social media platform once a week.
• Go to two events per month (virtual or in-person) with the goal of one genuine connection.
• Send a follow-up email to someone you enjoyed chatting with recently.
• Use social media to actually connect — not just promote.
• When you’re talking with someone who might need your help, be real. Skip the pitch, and listen. Then share how you can support them, clearly and directly, if appropriate.

As you’ve been reading this article, you may not have realized that even this is marketing. I chose this form of marketing because I enjoy it, it brings value to you, and it keeps my name in your orbit. One day, you may need something — and I’ll happen to have just sent out an article that reminds you I can help you with that. Or we’ll have a conversation — just two humans talking — and I’ll ask questions, listen, and offer help. It really can be that easy if you let the fear go.

So if you’re noticing fear or resistance in your marketing right now, know that it’s normal. The trick is to recognize it for the smoke screen it is, and keep going. You don’t have to feel fearless to take the next step, you just have to be willing to go for it.

This post was first published in 2016 and has been updated for 2025.